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I tear a test paper
星期三, 十一月 25, 2009
This is the first time ever in my life, i tear a test paper into pieces and threw it into rubbish bin. This is serious shit!!!! I hate History forever!!!!

I been spending all my times on this module, hoping to have some achievement in area where i am not so capable of, and yet it happened!!

I wrote so many rubbish in the paper which i wish to tear the paper off without handing in. This time is REAL, i only hope that i wont fail, cos i dun wan to see it ever ever again. If i manage to pass, i will tear the whole stacks of notes into pieces and step on it till my anger is ease and throw the whole thing into the rubbish bin.

It is whole pile of shit, fucking history!!!!!!! There is no point understanding those events, cos i wont do well as long as it is english based!!!!!!

I seriously hate it and i think i am become more and more agitated easily. My words cant express my agony and anger at all.
圆馒
in respond to shihao's post
星期四, 十一月 19, 2009
shihao, i do agree with wad u have said. the problem lies in which MT is not a compulsory sub for academic purpose. I am a great example, i hate English恨之入骨,but i have no choice as it is compulsory and the most important requirement for entry to uni. haha, so i learn and try to pass!!! i seriously hate it. If english is not a compulsory sub, i guess i would just put it aside and let the dust cover it totally. haha

However, i think it is quite hard to raise its importance. Singapore unlike other countries, we are multiracial. It would garther some resentment if government is going to make Chinese language compulsory, so the only way is to make MT including malays and Tamil compulsory. I think malay and tamil do not face the problem that chinese language encounter. So the government only can keep on emphasize on the importance of chinese language, but cant make it compulsory lo.

Moreover, Singapore's main focus is high tech ind, so we have to make science and maths on the high end. English today still hold its position in the world, in order to make singapore competitive, we need English.
圆馒
我是笨蛋
星期三, 十一月 18, 2009
我是猪头,白痴、笨蛋、傻瓜、低能、蠢、总之所有负面形容词都可以用在我身上。

前几个礼拜,我还以为自己很烂,胡思乱想,伤心难过,无心学习,心情起落到极点。

我烦了我的好朋友KIM 整个礼拜,还和很多人诉苦,也告诉了哥哥。我真的是没事找事做咧,以为他指的就是我,原来不是!!! 真的不是!!!

我真的觉得自己很笨,其实这也不是第一次,很久很久以前就这样了。

我很喜欢把所有负面的事情往自己身上揽,总觉得所有负面的事情都和我有关,最后就变得很悲观。我觉得我应该去淋一场雨,最好越久越好,是时候醒了。
圆馒
k box
星期日, 十一月 15, 2009
今天拖了疲惫的脚步去和我最亲爱的高中同学唱歌,为什么疲惫呢?因为我七点就起来啃书了,我觉得回去以前的时间,也就是12 点前睡,7点起来。我很久没有这么做了,为了我的脸着想,也为了我的身体,我还是不要再晚睡了。

不过今天的重点是:虽然我很累,可是我很开心。哈哈,fang fang的歌唱实力让我不唱也快乐,哈哈,看着她唱歌,仿佛世界再也没有什么值得悲伤,她就是焦点。我是说真的,每次和他们出去都很开心,可以忘了所有的烦恼。哈哈,虽然说mei mei每次都挖苦我,shi hao 也有啦,说我笨咯,可是那是玩笑,他们从高一就开到现在,哈哈。

总之我现在心情很不错,课业上的烦恼也抛到九霄云外了。不再为我失败的而伤心难过,现在我只想好好睡一觉,明天再次冲驰。呵呵
圆馒
这几天
星期三, 十一月 11, 2009
这几天我觉得很难过又伤心,原来被否定的感觉是如此的难受。

kim 劝了我好几天,可是我的心情一直好不起来,为什么你要这样对我呢? 我一直拼命地表现出我很快乐,现在我明白了,人在最伤心的时候会表现得很快乐。

我把我的心情告诉了我哥,他的话使我觉得很安心“别理他,难过又不能当饭吃。”虽然哥说的不多但是寥寥几句,我看了,心情的确好了很多。原来我一直缺乏的不是朋友的安慰,而是亲人的鼓励。

我记得我会把所有的事情告诉朋友而不是亲人,因为这里没什么亲人,跟我爸说,简直就是浪费口水,他只会“哼”一句就走开了。我现在明白《命运的迹线》中小明的感受。在我的兄弟姐妹中,我的排行也满大的,跟我姐说没意思,跟哥说还比较好点。哥哥的话会让我得到了安慰,我想我会好起来的。

其实呀,我很想回到小时候,和兄弟姐妹们玩耍的时候。每天和哥一起上学放学,和姐弟妹玩伴家家酒。哥哥对我也很好,我记得我生大病时,是他帮我完成了作业,好好哦。希望哥能够快点找到他的伴侣,哈哈,我要喝喜酒。

如果你问我,在我人生中最快乐的时候是几时?我会说是我的童年,因为那时的生命是最完整。我喜欢我的家庭,我喜欢我的学校,我喜欢周围的一切,如果可以选择,我希望我没有来到新加坡,如果没有来,也许这一切都不会发生了,我还是那个快乐的我。

现在我的头很痛,很想要爆开似的。
圆馒
凋零的心 (not sure of the title, but it is nice)
星期四, 十一月 05, 2009
如何让你遇见我
在我最美丽的时刻 为这
我已在佛前 求了五百年

求他让我们结一段尘缘

佛于是把我化作一棵树
长在你必经的路旁
阳光下慎重地开满了花
朵朵都是我前世的盼望

当你走近 请你细听
颤抖的叶是我等待的泪水
而当你终于无视地走过
在你身边落了一地的
朋友啊!那不是花瓣
那是我凋零的心
圆馒